We had our Christmas picture professionally taken for the first time.  Actually, it was the first time we have had professional photos as a family.

Let’s say that we are more of a candid shot kind of crowd.  We have taken our own Christmas picture in front of our tree, timer set, someone running, every year, but now that everyone is older things have gotten ugly.  We come dangerously close to killing each other.  Last year, we didn’t even do one.  We gave up.  So this year, I decided we would seek professional help.

The thing is, it turns out we aren’t a very posey family.

My daughters are forever taking pictures, selfies, or pictures of each other.  Here we are going to…Starbucks, or look at my new shoes.  They even have common gestures, hand on the hip, leg in front.  It’s a little scary to witness, but some of their pictures are pretty cute.

My son thinks he’s the cat’s ass (as my grandmother would say), so he’s very comfortable in front of the camera.  Fortunately, he doesn’t take selfies, but he never shies away from a camera.

Michael and I do not often have time to take pictures of ourselves, or each other, unless we are on vacation.  We both take this as a very good sign we are fairly productive human beings.

So, take all five of us, showered, as polished as we are going to get, and put us in front of a professional photographer.  One word…awkward.  The girls want the ends because they need the hand on the hip, middle son always wants to be in the middle and Michael and I are trying to keep a straight face when we are asked to lean in a little more.

We took the pictures out by our house, which was nice because we live in some beautiful desert.  Emily, our photographer, was lovely.  The whole thing was as pleasant as it could possibly be under the circumstances, but I’m not sure how people do this all the time.  I mean, there are families that have all sorts of pictures done.  They rock the family photo.

The Ewens family, not so much.

Maybe we just need more practice.  Emily sent us a sneak peek and we look pretty good, except for the one the oldest hates, the one where Michael’s mouth is just…odd, and the one where I look like a hunchback, but other that that, a couple of them are cute.  When the rest come back, I’m sure we will laugh our asses off and hopefully have a respectable Christmas picture to send to our friends and family.  Mission accomplished and no one was hurt.

My thoughts from the laundry room.  Uncomfortable Sleep.

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