Rose Water

I have never been a fan of Valentine’s Day.

“It’s cheap and cheesy.”  That’s what I always say, or, “It’s a Hallmark holiday, for guys that need a reason to be romantic.”

Valentine’s Day is my oldest daughter’s favorite holiday.  I’m not sure how that happened, it must stem from the little valentine bags we used to make for school.  I did get into Valentine’s Day when my children were younger.  I like the colors and the boxes of valentines.

Some people take Valentine’s Day very seriously.  They plan or propose, even marry on the day.  I wonder what makes them different from me.  Why do they see it as romantic, a day important enough for a wedding?  I can’t find a single thing romantic in all of the frenzy.  Maybe I have underlying issues.

I have never received a valentine from a boy.

Sure, I’ve opened my share of Snoopy or Scooby Doo valentines from my classroom made valentine box.  Some of those were from boys in my class, but those aren’t exactly romantic.  It was back in the days when everyone got a card so no one felt left out.  I do remember some of my girlfriends saying if “from” is before a boy’s name, it doesn’t even count.

All of mine were “from.”

When I got older, I never dated anyone that was into Valentine’s Day, or maybe I told them I wasn’t into it before they even had a chance.  Maybe I made it a silly, stupid day and they simply followed suit.  Would my perspective have changed if my boyfriend showed up at my house with beautiful flowers and a great box of chocolates?  Not the cheap kind.

What if I was doing my anti-valentine thing and the man of my dreams dropped to his knee on Valentine’s Day and asked me to be with him forever?  Would I say, “Get up.  This is a silly day put together by retailers to rob you of your hard earned money by pushing overpriced flowers and bad bears?”

I don’t think I would.  Perhaps Valentine’s Day would take on some weight, meaning.

So maybe nothing super spectacular has ever happened to me on Valentine’s Day and that’s why I find it absurd. Maybe for some people, their special surprises have fallen on Valentine’s Day and that’s what makes it all butterflies and smiles.

I hope so.  I hope the millions of people, wearing pinching panties and sitting shoulder to shoulder in restaurants, all have tingly personal stories that give the day substance.  I hope it’s not just about candy and guys trapped in obligation.

If it’s not, if Valentine’s Day is full of couples out celebrating magical memories that happened to fall on February 14th, then I say, “I hope you have a wonderful day!”

If for the majority though it is, as I suspect, another “have to because everyone else is doing it,” then I say, “Stop. Valentine’s Day is ridiculous and love, romance, is an all year thing.  Save your money and buy your sweetheart gorgeous flowers in April or November when she least expects them.  Take her out on some random Tuesday because she’s had a tough day at work.  Don’t be a follower just because Hallmark says you’re a schlub if you don’t.”

My thoughts from the laundry room.  Kiss Goodnight.

3 thoughts on “Rose Water

  1. I was previously yoked to a person who had no clue how to be romantic any day of the year, so the hand drawn cartoon my husband drew a few years back of he and I hand in hand, is still my favorite grown up valentine.

  2. I’ve always had pretty much the same approach, TE. Of course, when I first met her, I had to “sound out” My Beloved Sandra to be sure she was on-board. Fortunately, she’s also pretty level-headed.

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