New Clothes

I will be another year older next week.  One more 365 day rotation completed.

I will be baking my own cake.

This year I have chosen the Chocolate Lavender Cake with Mascarpone Earl Grey German Buttercream.  If I was looking for an accurate self reflection at this point in my life, I would probably go with the vanilla, but I need this cake.  Something needs to change.

Chocolate because chocolate is always a good idea, it is really the cornerstone of my coping mechanism.

Lavender is lovely.  I keep it in my dresser drawers.  It makes me happy and I’ve never put it in a cake, so it’s something different.  I crave different.

Mascarpone because it’s yummy like cream cheese, but it costs more, it’s complicated, and harder to work with.  Me too.

Earl Grey is tea and I’m all about tea.  Tea heals and it makes me a better person.

German Buttercream because I’m part German, rigid and pale, tidy, solid, but sort of sweet, sometimes.

The past 365 days have not been stellar.  I find myself bored, which means I lack desire and I’m sitting around waiting for inspiration.  I’ve been more of a viewer than a doer this year.

Twenty-four hour cycles of ordinary, not my preferred state.

I did hike Machu Picchu.  If I had a bucket list, that would be a coup, but I have no such list.

So, it all comes down to the cake.  She’s a beauty.  Very little frosting and topped with a flower.  She’s quirky, a jumbled concoction, inspired, and filled with good things I lean on in life.

Cake, I will eat cake and turn up the music.  Steel myself for another turn around the earth and try for more windows down days.

My thoughts from the laundry room.  I Sleep Too Much.


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20 Comments Leave a comment

  1. I’m with you on the 24-hour cycles of ordinary. I’ve never thought about it that way but thanks for naming my restlessness. And Macchu Picchu? Brilliant. I’ve always felt drawn to it and don’t know why–but I’ll make it there someday. Here’s to a little peace with a good book and a cuppa’. Or your hands in the moist warm soil of summer, helping Mother Nature make something grow. Both calm me, to a point.

  2. Loved this post. Just remember another number doesn’t change a person–it’s really You and what You do with your wonderful year. So definitely kick up your heels, eat that fabulous cake and have a Happy, Happy Birthday! Cheers, J

  3. Sounds like you need more “Evonne” time 😉 You’re cute.. you always get reflective birthday time. Sometimes you just gotta throw it out the window and say “get off the babysitter Joel”

  4. Love this post…am now hungry with several hours before dinner; your cake sounds marvelous.
    Natal day greetings to you, Tracy…hope it is the start of a year of wonder and delight. ~nan

  5. I love your writing
    I so enjoy reading your blog
    Wishing you softening through this next turning around the sun
    So that feeling may seep into you and through you
    Happy happy birthday!

  6. Live it up, Laundrygirl.
    I love this metaphoric encapsulation: Mascarpone because it’s yummy like cream cheese, but it costs more, it’s complicated, and harder to work with. Me too.

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