Dark Load

According to my quick Google search, approximately 2.5 million people die every year in the United States.

I don’t often look at this stuff, but I’m on this “things will never be the same as they are in this second” kick and that sometimes moves me to think about the end.  A bit morbid, I know, but it’s good to notice.

Two and a half million people that, in theory, will not be here this time next year.  That feels like a lottery, random.  The top causes of death are heart disease and cancer, so there are factors that contribute to death, but not really.  I mean my Aunt Jean died of lung cancer years ago and she’d never smoked a cigarette in her life, so even disease can be a crap shoot.

Death is a strange thing to think about.  It’s uncomfortable for a lot of people, but we are all on our way there.  We are all dying.  I can’t say that I’m afraid to die.  I’m not sure what will happen when my heart beats for the last time, but all the theories are fine by me.  I have a wonderful life.  I’m truly blessed and if my time is up in 2015 . . . well, I guess I will be one of the 2.5 and that’s okay.

It could be me.  Why do we always assume it will be someone else?  Some other group of millions?

Look at all of those people who just lost their lives on the AsiaAir flight.  They got on a plane, probably assumed someone else would make up the death toll in their country.  I’m getting on a plane in a few days.  What makes my plane safe and that one crash?  I have no idea.  None of us do.

I feel like things are better when I look them in the eye.  I don’t know how long I have.  I hope I get to see 2015 and all the surprises packed into those 365 days.  I’m sure every one else does too.

Some of us aren’t going to make it.  Quite a few actually.  I suppose that’s why my friend, Jinger, tells me to “be in the moment, focus on the now.”

Here’s hoping most of the people that leave this coming year are older, have had a good run.  Sorry this isn’t a particularly uplifting final post of the year, but I’m on this “why not you, Tracy” kick too.

Soo . . .wow, this is awkward.  Happy New Year and, um, be safe out there?

My thoughts from the laundry room.  Sleep Tight.

acceptance death life thoughts

4 Comments Leave a comment

  1. I appreciate that. Unfortunately at age 5 I was not ready for these thoughts when my father died — kinda colours your life. Most years I manage to set it aside but not this time so I am glad someone else was a bit morbid too. Misery loves company 😉 I wish you a really safe, peaceful, 2015.

    • Five years old…I am so sorry. It does color a life. My daughter was eleven when she had to have emergency intracranial surgery. She had a horrible infection and there were nights in the hospital, I just knew she thought about dying. It changes a person. She’s an older soul to begin with, but I swear she takes not a second for granted. Maybe it’s good we are starting the year a touch morbid. It can only go up from here, right? 🙂 Safety and Peace to you and yours too. Thanks for visiting!

  2. I’m an optimist, Tracy so for sure you will enjoy a fabulous 2015. As for your plane trip, it will be a smooth, safe ride to and from your destination. Have a wonderful New Year, Tracy–happy, healthy and safe. . . .:)

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