Pattern

I dropped my AirPod in the toilet. While I was using the toilet.

How does this stuff even happen to me? Why didn’t I take them out on my way to the bathroom and set them on the counter like a normal person? No matter how many things I order, organize, or clean, I am always a hot mess.

Throughout my life, people have patted my whirling madness on the head in the name of things like working full-time in an office, wrangling three kids, and a marriage.

That’s why I had trash in my car and a mountain of laundry. Life and all that it threw at me was why I never managed put-together or lip liner.

Well, now my children are all over the age of twenty, I work from home (even when there’s not a killer virus out there), and I am still married. Michael must be the reason I dropped the AirPod in the toilet? It sure as hell wasn’t Jack’s fault. He’s a perfect puppy.

Unless maybe it is my fault. Unless it has been my fault all along. Maybe I’m responsible for my actions, including what happened after I realized my AirPod fell into the toilet.

I will spare you the details. Let’s just say I now have both AirPods. I did what I needed to do. I always have.

You see, while others are quick to pull the blame from me and themselves, I own that shit (ha, literally).

I have a ton of “issues” I deal with on the road to understanding me, but taking responsibility isn’t one of them. I am often wrong. I am usually late and harsh with my opinions. I am rarely brilliant and never perfect, but I say when I am wrong. Always.

And not with a cursory, “I’m sorry.” Apologizing in that way, with those words, has become a cursory nod to evade responsibility. “Well, I said I was sorry,” is now equivalent to “Don’t blame me. Blame someone or something else.”

Acceptance, saying you were wrong and taking responsibility for the accident, the disappointment, the carnage, is a rare and tough act indeed. But, so needed for health and happiness.

So, while I appreciate people creating excuses for the me I chose to be throughout my life, it was never necessary. I dropped the AirPod and all that other stuff too.

It was my fault. So simple.

My thoughts from the laundry room. Wake Up.

adulthood choices courage crazy life learning life reality thoughts working

4 Comments Leave a comment

  1. Let’s start with the lip liner. Because, well, yes. Who has the freakin’ time? Even when you have the time. And thank you for a statement of personal responsibility. I’m still awaiting more of those on our national stage . . .

  2. Excuse me while I finish chortling over Ron’s reply 🙂 I’m far too perfect for dropping Air-Pods in the toilet, but anything else is fair game. Whatever Fate up there is watching–has jinxed whatever I’m holding in my hand, allowing it to kerplunk into the you-know-where.
    So far, two cell-phones and one mini-book have taken the dive into the bowl. I’m determined to hang on tight to anything else that may feel adventurous. . . Maybe we can join forces and form a club. . .?

  3. I try to make sure that everyone always knows that there’s plenty of blame to go around & we ALL should grab our share. Then I try to take as little as possible (because I’m so generous).
    You wouldn’t even believe my what’s-that-in-the-toilet-bowl story, so I won’t share it with you here, but — trust me — it makes AirPods seem like small potatoes.

    Thanks for sharing.

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