I dropped my AirPod in the toilet. While I was using the toilet.
How does this stuff even happen to me? Why didn’t I take them out on my way to the bathroom and set them on the counter like a normal person? No matter how many things I order, organize, or clean, I am always a hot mess.
Throughout my life, people have patted my whirling madness on the head in the name of things like working full-time in an office, wrangling three kids, and a marriage.
That’s why I had trash in my car and a mountain of laundry. Life and all that it threw at me was why I never managed put-together or lip liner.
Well, now my children are all over the age of twenty, I work from home (even when there’s not a killer virus out there), and I am still married. Michael must be the reason I dropped the AirPod in the toilet? It sure as hell wasn’t Jack’s fault. He’s a perfect puppy.
Unless maybe it is my fault. Unless it has been my fault all along. Maybe I’m responsible for my actions, including what happened after I realized my AirPod fell into the toilet.
I will spare you the details. Let’s just say I now have both AirPods. I did what I needed to do. I always have.
You see, while others are quick to pull the blame from me and themselves, I own that shit (ha, literally).
I have a ton of “issues” I deal with on the road to understanding me, but taking responsibility isn’t one of them. I am often wrong. I am usually late and harsh with my opinions. I am rarely brilliant and never perfect, but I say when I am wrong. Always.
And not with a cursory, “I’m sorry.” Apologizing in that way, with those words, has become a cursory nod to evade responsibility. “Well, I said I was sorry,” is now equivalent to “Don’t blame me. Blame someone or something else.”
Acceptance, saying you were wrong and taking responsibility for the accident, the disappointment, the carnage, is a rare and tough act indeed. But, so needed for health and happiness.
So, while I appreciate people creating excuses for the me I chose to be throughout my life, it was never necessary. I dropped the AirPod and all that other stuff too.
It was my fault. So simple.
My thoughts from the laundry room. Wake Up.