My mom moved us from New York to Arizona the summer I turned eleven. When the plane landed, and 105 degrees of hell hit my face, I vowed to leave the state as soon as I was an adult and could make my own life. I left for college at eighteen and lived in Arizona…
The last day of 2021 deserves a blog post. Actually, 2021 was a real bitch and deserves nothing, but here goes. Endings are sometimes a party, but they are often tricky. The world lost Betty White today. OG move crossing to the other side on the last day of the year, but also difficult for…
If I lived in Paris, I would never close the windows. The traffic noise below my apartment would become the soundtrack of my early mornings, my lazy afternoons, and my midnight snacks. My apartment would be old with generations of white paint, brass knobs, and creaky floors. During winter or rain, I’d make tea in…
If my boobs were small and I was skinny, I would eat cake every day for breakfast and lunch. Sometimes frosting, sometimes not, but always cake. At night, I would choose between lasagna and pizza. Real lasagna with real cheese or pizza with the perfect amount of crust and a sauce that wasn’t too sweet.…
I’m overwhelmed. Like hands full with too many things at the back of the grocery store and I didn’t get a cart, overwhelmed. There’s too much to do, it all needs to be done well and being one of those face painters at the Renaissance Fair is looking ideal. When am I going to learn? Things seem…
It is the first day of December. Here come the moods. Not all bad moods, not all warm and fuzzy moods, just moods. December is a moody month for me. I think a lot during the middle months, so December, the last month, the end to a year, a holiday month, really gets me going.…
I learned to ride a bike when I was eleven. We lived in Bronxville, New York. Santa brought me a burgundy Ross bike for Christmas. My first real bike, and while I was excited about the idea of being a bike rider, the actual process eluded me. I would sit and stare at my bike while thoughts of…
If I had a sister, she would be taller than me. And older. I’d be the curvy one. She’d be the long legs, straight up and down one. Her hair would be darker, longer and not as thick as mine. Her eyes would be rounder, bigger, with more green, actually her eyes would be green. She…
The British Museum is following me on Twitter. I realize this is of little importance to most people. They do follow 38,600 tweeters, so I understand the lack of enthusiasm. For me though, this is sort of like, oh I don’t know, Queen Elizabeth, the first one, showing up at my door and telling me she,…