Black and Yellow

I’m overwhelmed.

Like hands full with too many things at the back of the grocery store and I didn’t get a cart, overwhelmed. There’s too much to do, it all needs to be done well and being one of those face painters at the Renaissance Fair is looking ideal.

When am I going to learn? Things seem doable at the time I’m putting them on my calendar or nodding my head. Sure! Yes! Absolutely, I can do that! When I’m planning, when it’s months away, I am super Container Store organized.

I used to have this dream when I was a little girl. I was in this beautiful field full of blooming bushes. The flowers smelled delicious and the grass was perfect and green.  In the dream, I’m in a cute little dress and walking around the bushes, touching the flowers, most of which are in the distance. I’m happy and fascinated by the hum of a few bumble bees. They are busy working the flowers, being bees.

As I continue walking, I notice more and more bees. There aren’t just a few, there are a lot of bees. In the dream, I stop, notice my feet are bare. My toes are painted pink. When I look up, there is a big bumble bee approaching from far away.

I smile, watching him as he swerves his way toward me. His body is fuzzy and his little eyes are glassy. Soon I can see every detail of the bee. He’s rapidly approaching and instead of a happy Pooh Bear honey bee, he looks pissed, mean. At this point, I’m locked on the bee and I can’t look away.

He keeps coming, the buzz gets louder and just as he’s about to slam right into my face, I wake up. Back then, I would usually throw my yellow flower comforter off my little girl body, heart racing.  Once I caught my breath, shook the look on that sinister bee’s face out of my mind, I’d shuffle to the kitchen for a drink of water.

I never understood the dream when I was little. As I got older, I thought maybe it meant I was afraid of bees. How could such harmless beauty, the pleasant hum of work, turn so ugly?

I get it now.

My thoughts from the laundry room. Zzzzzzz.

5 thoughts on “Black and Yellow

  1. What a perfect analogy of how it feels when that moment of overwhelm comes! I do the same thing, thinking I can accomplish the world and I can barely only handle my own little household. Hugs!

  2. Busy as a bee! You must be right! Check out what the Dream Dictionary says: “The meaning of dream involving bees is usually one having to do with studiousness, or being busy. Bees are by nature, busy creatures, and though we don’t often consider them as such, they are extremely well known for tirelessly working for their queen’s benefit. This is the reason that a dream meaning for bees involves wealth and happiness. When you see bees in your dreams you can expect to be happy and healthy for however long your luck lasts. These dream meanings can also serve as a symbol letting you know that you have been lucky for the past few days. Maybe you’ve gotten a raise recently or a promotion. Perhaps you have come across a small fortune. Either way, the bees are in your dream to indicate your good fortune that you’ve had recently.”
    More: http://www.gotohoroscope.com/txt/dream-dictionary-bees.html

  3. This sounds like the proverbial freight train bearing down on us–yes, I did say “us” as I did the same thing by committing to too many projects months in advance and now we’re both paying for it! I blame it on the month of October, the Chinese Moon Festival, the Canadian Thanksgiving, fields of pumpkins and a bountiful harvest–none of which is actually blameable but as a well-meaning friend pointed out, Christmas is only 2 months away!
    And that should make the Devil Bee and the Runaway Freight Train happy. . . Love your piece, Tracy! 🙂

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