Food Stains

I like food.

I’ve tried a lot of it.  I’m really good at eating and I rarely discriminate.

Sushi, falafel, matzo ball soup, chicken and waffles, just waffles.  There’s nothing better than a great calzone, or a slice of good pizza, the kind you can fold up and eat properly.  Eggplant parmesan…”Yes, can I get the big corner piece with the crusty edge?”

Noodles, Swiss chard, tomatoes, olive oil, the whole olive for that matter, and mushrooms.  Mushrooms every day, please.

Ochre, I’m in love with ochre.  Especially in gumbo.

I like sweet and spicy, but not too spicy.  If I can’t feel my tongue a few bites in, I’m not having a good time.  A great steak, so long as the cow was allowed to eat grass and roam for miles, and a yummy salad with goodies in it.

Baked potato, sweet potato, I’m there.

Lately I’m into baking Japanese yams.  They are like sweet potatoes, but yummier.  It’s because they are Japanese.  I’m pretty sure I could live off that country’s cuisine alone.

Eh, maybe not because I would miss Super Nachos.  Yes, with chicken and about half the refried beans.  Real cheese.  I don’t do canned cheese.  Real cheese and yummy pico and guac, there can never be too much guac.

Nachos, I’ve gone there, so let’s now leave the everyday healthy organic food behind.  I do love black cod with radicchio, but say goodbye to “clean eating” because things are about to get very junior high sleepover.

Grilled cheese…dear Lord.  Thick bread, wheat bread, crusty bread or even like a that really thin pumpernickel bread.  It all works when butter and cheese are involved.  Any kind of cheese.  I like swiss or a mixture of cheeses I can’t pronounce. I’ve also been know to go processed.  I don’t care how much of a food snob you are, Kraft singles lovingly smushed and melted between two pieces of Texas toast is good stuff.

Let’s not forget Bologna (the pork and beef one that almost seems a little rubbery), white bread (something like Rainbow or Wonder), Miracle Whip (yes, don’t judge!) and a slice of Kraft American cheese.  That’s the ticket right there.

Before we leave sandwiches I would be remiss if I didn’t give a nod to the classic peanut butter and jelly.  I like mine on wheat bread with freshly ground peanut butter, if I can get it. If not, Jiff Smooth, never Skippy.  A nice thick smear of that on both pieces of bread and then strawberry jam or preserves, the chunky pieces of fruit kind, in the middle.  Delicious.

I’m super hungry right now.  What was the point of this post?

Oh, right.  I love food and I’ve decided that I will probably never be a Victoria’s Secret model.  Now, I know what you’re thinking.  Really, Tracy?  Are you sure because it seems like you were made for that job.  I know, but no.  It would never work for me.

I love food too much and my basic life plan is to continue sweating enough, keep all the organs happy, so I can still fit into my jeans and never have to break up with moist delicious chocolate cake.

Desserts…we haven’t even covered desserts.  Cookies are really worthy of their own post.  Is it lunchtime yet?

My thoughts from the laundry room.  Late Night Snack.

food fun humor life love

18 Comments Leave a comment

  1. If you’re wearing a junk-food recipe dress with the words written in small letters on billowing pleats, written with words from many sources, getting food stains on it would be a shame like destroying a library at lunch time. But a good forensic lab could analyze the stains and recover the recipes. It might be a little expensive. Maybe eating nude would be better. Maybe a good dry-wit cleaner could lick that problem without harsh chemicals. Food stains are definitely not like the scarlet letter or telegram.

  2. I don’t think that I could ever find somebody sexy who wasn’t at least occasionally overwhelmed by the sensuality of good food.
    I’ll never be skinny. But I like to think that it’s at least a little bit of truth in advertising that I can be trusted to give due reverence to the body’s joys in all kinds of forms.

  3. Best blog ever for this week—Food–who can ever say enough about food? But hey, Tracy, desserts definitely deserve a blog too, especially anything with chocolate! And to judyt54–try peanut butter with sweet pickles, yum!

  4. this was cruel. Ive been experimenting with “peanut–butter–and” and it turns out that while PB is strong tasting by itself it is also a bit flexible, and will take on almost anything you put with it. PB and banana, PB and green chili pepper preserves (which are not hot, just green), PB and apple slices. It’s a whole new world out there. My husband used to be a fan of PB and onions, with catchup/catsup/ketchup,said it tasted like a cheeseburger. Who knew…

  5. That’s it. It’s a conspiracy. I do not have enough time to cook or order in before I have to pick up my son and every blogger I’m reading seems to have a pic or description of food:). Murphy’s Law. I’m with you. Food is not just fuel, but a sensual pleasure. Sigh. So say my hips.

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